We all experience some stress at times. The amount of pressure that we can handle constructively will vary, though. When our stress level becomes so high that our bodies can no longer effectively manage it, we may also begin to experience some physical symptoms of strain. Each of us experiences stress differently, but there are some common features. Learn to recognize your own signs.

Notice all that apply to you:

• Anxiety

• Depression

• Difficulty Sleeping

• Nightmares

• Headaches

• Muscle Tensions

• Stomach Problems

• Change in Emotional Responsiveness

• Confusion

• Difficulty Concentrating

• Change in Appetite

• Fatigue

• Crying Spells

• Irritability

• Increased Drug/Alcohol Use

• Change in Sex Drive or Performance

10 Tips for Getting The Upper Hand on Stress

1)    Be good to yourself.  You deserve it.
2)    Decide what is fun for you... and do it.
3)    Balance between work, home responsibilities, leisure activities, exercise, diet, and sleep.
4)   Express your feelings... to someone, or write them down.
5)    If you want to solve a problem, look for solutions. There are always choices to be made.
6)    If you have made a lot of changes in the past year, don’t make any more for a while, unless you absolutely have to.
7)    If you don’t have time to do everything, try to use your time more wisely... or cross some “Things To Do” off your list.
8)    Find time to relax on a daily basis.
9)    Listen to your body. It will tell you when you are under stress.  If you learn to listen closely, you can respond before the stress gets too overwhelming.
10)    AA Prayer: God grant me the ability to recognize the things I can change, the courage to face the things I can’t change, and the wisdom to know the difference.

How Therapy Helps

• It Provides A Safe Place To Talk About What Bothers You.

• It Is Confidential.

• Dealing With The Troubling Thoughts And Feelings Makes You Feel Better.

• It Doesn't Burden Your Family Or Loved Ones.

• It Helps You Feel More Confident And Secure.

• It Provides An Impartial And Unbiased Perspective. 

It Helps You Get Your Life Back Together 

Stress often shows up in the body. While the body’s symptoms may have a medical basis, there is often a psychological and emotional basis as well. The mind and the body are each integrated with the other, and the body is our earliest mechanism for processing experience. This is especially true when we recognize that the brain is a part of the body and therefore is an essential player in how the mind operates.

Sometimes, the body’s reactions may be our first alert that we are even feeling any stress. Many of us have heard the phrase “the language of the body,” and we can learn a lot about our emotions, our general psychological functioning, and ourselves in general if we can learn to listen to and understand that language.

Following are some of the possible and frequent body symptoms that we have recognized as also having psychological and emotional components.

Notice all that apply to you.

• PAINS

  • Headaches

  • Muscle Tensions

  • Back Pain

  • Shoulder Pain

  • Contracted And Painful Muscles In Any Part Of The Body

  • Painful Intercourse

• ABDOMINAL PROBLEMS

  • Ulcers

  • Stomach Problems

  • Gastritis

  • Colitis

  • “Heartburn” Or “Sour Stomach”

  • Nausea

• Elimination Problems

  • Constipation

  • Diarrhea Or Loose Bowels

• BREATHING PROBLEMS

  • Asthma

  • Shortness Of Breath

  • Shallow Breathing

  • Panicked Breathing (Difficulty Catching Your Breath)

• SLEEP DISTURBANCES

  • Difficulty Falling Asleep

  • Difficulty Staying Asleep (Waking During The Night)

  • Difficulty Getting Back To Sleep

  • Restless Sleep

  • Early Awakening

  • Nightmares (Disturbing Dreams)

  • Bladder And Bowel Control While Sleeping (Especially For Children)

• SKIN PROBLEMS

  • Rashes

  • Hives

  • Eczema

  • Acne

• EATING PATTERNS

  • Loss Of Appetite

  • Overeating

  • Disturbed Eating Patterns

  • Bingeing

    • Purging

    • Emotional Eating

      • Overeating

      • Loss Of Appetite

• BALANCE/CONSCIOUSNESS

  • Dizziness

  • Feeling Faint

  • Lightheadedness

• FATIGUE/TIREDNESS

  • Chronic

  • Patterned

• HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE

• PERCEPTUAL DISTURBANCES & DISTORTIONS

  • Visual

  • Eye Strain

  • Visual Hallucinations (Seeing Things)

  • Auditory/Hearing

    • Changes In Sound Levels

    • Auditory Hallucinations (Hearing Things)

• SEXUAL DISTURBANCES

  • Lack Of Sexual Arousal

  • Excessive Sexual Arousal

  • Painful Intercourse

  • Difficulty Reaching Orgasm

  • Men

    • Erection Difficulties

    • Obtaining Erection

    • Sustaining Erection

    • Premature Ejaculation

  • Women

    • Lubrication Problems

Emotions are a normal part of being human, but sometimes they can be extremely disturbing to experience. What may be distressing is not just the emotion itself but also how strongly you feel it or what you want to do about it.

Following are some of the possible emotions that you may have difficulty handling.

• FEAR

  • Panic

  • Anxiety

  • Nervousness

  • Agitation

  • Jitteriness

  • Phobias (Irrational Fears)

    • Agoraphobia (Fear Of Going Outside)

    • Fear Of Flying

    • Fear Of Germs

    • Other Irrational Fears

• DEPRESSION

  • Sadness

  • Loneliness

  • Emptiness

  • Grief

  • General Unhappiness Or Dissatisfaction In Living

• ANGER

  •  RAGE

• JEALOUSY

• ENVY

• LUST

• SHAME

• LACK OF EMOTIONAL ENJOYMENT

  • Emotional Disconnection/Detachment

Sometimes you may find that your impulses or behaviors may be distressing for you or may lead you to get you into some kind of trouble.

Following are some of the possible areas where you may be having difficulty managing your behaviors or impulses and they may present a problem for you.

• COMPULSIVE BEHAVIORS (You HAVE To Do Something — and Have to Keep Doing It)

  • Engaging in Rituals

    • Hand Washing

    • Counting

    • Repeating Certain Behaviors

  • Touch Something 3 Times (or x times)

  • Take A Certain Driving Route

  • Checking Behaviors & Rituals (Examples)

    • Checking Locks (A Certain Number Of Times)

    • Part Of Bedtime Ritual

    • Part Of Leaving Home Ritual

    • Leaving Car

    • Checking Stove To See If It’s Turned Off

• ADDICTIVE BEHAVIORS

  • Eating Related

  • Drugs Or Alcohol

  • Sex

  • Gambling

  • Spending

  • Computer Gaming

  • TV Watching

  • Smoking

  • Cutting (Self-Mutilation)

  • Work

  • Exercise

• IMPULSIVE BEHAVIORS

  • Difficulty Managing Feelings (Having To Act On Them)

    • Anger

      • Verbal Outbursts

      • Swearing/Name Calling

      • Saying Things You Don’t Mean And Later Regret

        • Saying Things Without Regard To Consequences That Later Get You In Trouble

    • Physical Actions

      • Hitting/Throwing Things

      • Hitting People

    • Sexual Feelings

• PROBLEMATIC IMPULSES/BEHAVIORS

  • Not Just Having These Thoughts, But The Impulses Feel Irresistible

    • You REALLY Want To Do It

      • Suicidal Impulses/Attempts

      • Violent Impulses/Actions

      • Homicidal Impulses/Attempts

• PROBLEMATIC BEHAVIORS

  • Stealing Things (Kleptomania)

  • Fire Setting (Pyromania)

Sometimes you may find that your thinking may be distressing for you or may lead you to get you into some kind of trouble.

Following are some of the possible areas where you may be having difficulty managing your thoughts or they may present a problem for you.

• MEMORY PROBLEMS

• CONFUSION

• DISORIENTATION

  • Not Knowing Where You Are

  • Not Knowing Why You Are There

  • Not Knowing What Day It Is

• OBSESSIVE THOUGHTS

  • Relentlessly Thinking About Something

    • Having To Think About Something

    • Can’t Get These Thoughts Out Of Your Mind

    • Preoccupations

      • Germs/Cleanliness

      • Safety

      • Addictive Behaviors

        • Eating Related

        • Drugs Or Alcohol

        • Sex

        • Gambling

        • Spending

        • Computer Gaming

        • TV Watching

        • Smoking

        • Cutting (Self-Mutilation)

        • Work

        • Exercise

  • Intrusive Thoughts

    • Thoughts Come Into Your Mind Without Your Wanting Them To Be There

    • Recollections Of Past Events

    • Expectations (Especially Fearful Ones) About Future Events

    • Irrational Thoughts

      • Unreasonable Thoughts/Expectations

      • Superstitious Thinking

      • Magical Thinking

• DELUSIONS (False Conceptions, examples)

  • “People Are Plotting Against Me”

  • “The FBI Is After Me”

  • “I Am God”

  • Inflated Self Worth, Power, Or Belief

  • Other People Have Certain Thoughts About You (especially when you have never actually met them in person)

  • Belief You Have A Medical Condition Despite Negative Tests

Addiction refers to those kinds of behaviors (what are sometimes or loosely called “habits”) that involve the interplay between several factors. These may involve substances, behaviors, or an interchange among them.

• OBSESSIVE THOUGHTS

  • Recurrent, Persistent Thoughts That Seem To Invade Your Consciousness

  • You Can’t Stop Thinking About Them

• COMPULSIVE BEHAVIORS

  • Impulses That Seem To Drive You

  • Things That You Feel You Have To Do

  • You Do Them Even Though You “Know” You Shouldn’t

  • You Do Them Even Though They Have Negative Consequences In Your Life

• TOLERANCE

  • The Need For More Of The Substance Or Behavior In Order To Reach The Desired And Previously Obtained Effect

  • You Need To Do It More In Order To Have It “Work” For You

• DEPENDENCE

  • You Depend On It In Order To Feel Good

  • You Feel Like You Can’t Do Without It

  • You Need It, Not Just Want It

• WITHDRAWAL

  • You Feel Bad When You Don’t Use The Substance Or Do The Behavior

  • Symptoms May Include:

    • Change In Mood

    • Anxiety/Panic

    • Restlessness

    • Agitation

    • Irritability

    • Apathy

    • Attention/Concentration Difficulties

    • Sleep Disturbances

    • Change In Appetite

    • Depression

    • Physical Discomforts/Distress

    • Tremors/Convulsions

    • Change In Sexual Appetite/Functioning

  • You Return (Or Are Strongly Drawn To Return) To The Substance Or Behavior In Order To Relieve The Discomfort Or Distress Of The Withdrawal Symptoms

• SUBSTANCES

  • Alcohol

  • Marijuana

  • Cocaine

  • Methamhetamines

  • “Party” Drugs

  • Other Drugs

  • Food

    • Compulsive Overeating

    • Bulimia

    • Anorexia

• BEHAVIORS

  • People often recognize that they may have difficulty with alcohol or drugs, though frequently they also need some help to evaluate how great that difficulty is or isn’t and what they might be able to do about it. You might be asking some of the same questions about some of your behaviors as well, such as:

    • Computer Or Internet Usage

    • Online Porn

    • Sexual Behaviors And Compulsions

    • Gambling

    • Spending

    • TV Watching

    • Eating

    • Cutting (Self Mutilation)

    • Any Other Thing You Do That Somehow Feels Questionable Or Possibly Out Of Control In Your Life

  • Identity Issues

  • Thought Processes

  • Relationship Issues

    • Includes Some Of The Ways You Interact With Other People.

    • Some People Even Feel Like They Are Addicted To Another Person, What Sometimes Has Been Referred To As “Love Addiction.”

• TREATMENT CONSIDERATIONS

  • 12-Step – Yes or no?

    • I am comfortable working either within a 12-step model or outside it

    • Some people are able to work easily with the 12-step idea of a “higher power,” while others are not.  I am comfortable working with you to explore and examine what works best for you concerning this issue.

  • Some people have a goal of complete sobriety, whereas others want to work towards “harm reduction.”  I am comfortable working with you to explore what your goals are and to help you reach them.

  • Many people working with me find it extremely helpful to begin looking at many of the issues and behaviors in their life from a perspective of addiction.  They often discover that it adds understanding and avenues for change and resolution.

We all may have difficulty with some aspect of relationships at times in our lives. Getting some help can make those periods move smoother, change faster, occur less frequently, and be less disruptive or traumatic.

Following are some of the FREQUENT AREAS WHERE PEOPLE STRUGGLE IN RELATIONSHIPS (not complete – may include other areas not noted).

• Intimacy (Personal, Not Just Sexual)

• Getting Into Relationships

• Getting Out Of Relationships

• Managing Loss Of Relationships

  • Separation

  • Divorce

  • Death

  • Co-Dependency

• Increased Communication & Pleasure

• Parent/Child Relationships

Following are some of the possible areas where sexual issues may present a problem for you.

• MEDICAL PROBLEMS (May Also Have Psychological Origins)

  • Menstrual Problems

  • Sexual Diseases

    • HIV

    • Aids

    • Herpes

    • Gonorrhea

    • Syphilis

    • Clamidia

  • Painful Constriction Of The Vagina

  • Painful Sensations In The Penis

  • Painful Intercourse

  • Difficulty With Vaginal Lubrication In Sex

  • Difficulty Getting Or Maintaining An Erection

  • Difficulty Ejaculating (Too Soon, Too Late)

  • Difficulty Obtaining Orgasm

• SEXUAL INTEREST

  • Lack Of Interest In Sex

  • Obsessive Sexual Interest

• SEXUAL ENJOYMENT

  • Lack Of Enjoyment In Sex

• SEXUAL PERFORMANCE

  • Difficulty Getting Or Maintaining An Erection

  • Difficulty Ejaculating (Too Soon, Too Late)

  • Difficulty Obtaining Orgasm

• BEHAVIORAL ISSUES RELATING TO SEX

  • Concerns About Masturbation

  • Decisions About Whether Or Not To Have Sex While Dating

  • Sexual Compulsion

  • Sexual Promiscuity

  • Transvestitism (Sexual Excitement From Dressing In Clothing Of The Opposite Sex)

  • Issues About Use Of Pornography

  • Pedophilia (Sex With Children)

  • Bestiality (Sex With Animals)

  • Exhibitionism (Sexual Excitement Of Showing, Being Seen)

  • Voyeurism (Sexual Excitement Of Looking, Peeping Tom)

  • Fetishism (Preoccupation With Use Of Objects As Sexual Outlet)

  • Necrophilia (Sex With Dead Bodies)

  • Sadism (Enjoyment Of Hurting Others)

  • Masochism (Sexual/Erotic Enjoyment Of Pain/Humiliation)

• TRAUMATIC EXPERIENCES RELATING TO SEX

  • Rape

  • Incest

  • Sexual Child Abuse (Either In The Present Or The Past)

• SEXUAL IDENTITY &/OR ORIENTATION

  • Homosexuality

  • Bisexuality

  • Transexuality/Transgender

    • Sex Change (Gender Reassignment) Considerations

    • Belief You Were Born Into The Body Of The Wrong Sex/Gender

“I Want My Child To Be Happy.”

Following are some of the possible areas where you may be having difficulty in your role as parent or prospective parent.

• PREGNANCY ISSUES

  • Deciding Whether Or Not To Have Children

  • Unwanted Pregnancy

  • Inability To Get Pregnant

  • Adoption

• MANAGING DISCIPLINE

  • Parental Overprotection

  • Parental Overindulgence

  • Performance Standards

    • Rigid Perfectionism

    • Negligence/Laxity

• DIFFICULTY MANAGING RELATIONSHIPS BETWEEN CHILDREN

  • Sibling Rivalry

  • Taking Sides Between Children

• PROBLEMS IN RELATIONSHIPS WITH IN-LAWS

  • Contradictory Demands Of Parents

  • Realization Of Children’s Growing Up

• REACHING DEVELOPMENTAL OR ACADEMIC MILESTONES

• EMPTY NEST

• BECOMING/BEING A GRANDPARENT

“I Want My Child To Be Happier.”

Following are some of the possible areas where issues about your children may present a problem for you

• PHYSICAL ISSUES

  • Vision Difficulties

  • Hearing Difficulties

  • Muscular/Motor Difficulties

  • Learning Difficulties

  • Excessive/Unexplained Physical Illnesses Or Injuries

  • Coping With Physical Illnesses

• DEVELOPMENTAL ISSUES

  • Developmental Disabilities

  • Developmental Milestones

    • Walking

    • Talking

    • Toilet Training

    • Dealing With Strangers

    • Going To School

  • Stuttering

  • Eating Problems

  • Excessive Shyness

  • Fears Of Others

  • Delayed Development

• SLEEP ISSUES

  • Difficulties Going To Bed

  • Fears About Going To Sleep

  • Problems Concerning Where Child Sleeps (Own Bed vs. With Parents)

  • Difficulties Staying Asleep

  • Night Terrors, Nightmares

  • Bed-Wetting

• BEHAVIORAL DIFFICULTIES

  • Eating Disturbances

  • Psychosomatic Problems (Body Disturbances)

  • Nail Biting

  • Tics (Nervous Behaviors, Ex. Neck Jerking, Blinking)

  • Discipline Problems

  • Fighting/Hitting

  • Delinquency (Problems With The Law)

  • Drugs

  • Alcohol

• EMOTIONAL DIFFICULTIES

  • Temper Tantrums

  • Aggressive Behaviors

  • Excessive Shyness

  • Behavior Problems

  • Irrational Fears

  • Difficulty Managing Sadness

• CONFLICTS WITH OTHERS

  • Teachers

  • Other Students

    • Bullying

  • Brothers Or Sisters

    • Sibling Rivalry

    • Step-Siblings

  • Parents

    • Conflict With Parents Over Personal Habits And Lifestyle

    • Choice Of Friends

    • Boyfriends/Girlfriends

  • Difficulty In Relating To Other Children

• SCHOOL ISSUES

  • Problems In Discipline (At Home Or School)

  • Problems In Learning

  • Difficulty In Relating To Other Children

  • School Fears

  • Change In Schools

  • Avoiding School

  • Entering School

  • Poor School Performance

  • Graduation From School

  • Going To College

• DATING ISSUES

  • When To Begin Dating

  • Child’s Choice Of Dating Partners

  • Sex And Love In Dating

• SEXUALITY

  • Gender Identity

  • Concerns About Sex

  • Child’s Changing Body (Ex. Body Hair, Menstruation, Breasts)

  • Early Sex Play

  • Introduction To Sex

  • Unwanted Pregnancy

  • Boyfriends/Girlfriends

  • Children’s Sexual Orientation

• ADJUSTMENT ISSUES

  • Coping With Deaths In The Family

  • Loss Of Friends Through Moving

  • Coping With Divorce

  • Coping With Parent’s Remarriage

  • Coping With Birth Of New Child In Family

  • Adjusting To New Stepfamily

  • Leaving Home

  • Stresses To Succeed

  • Successes/Failures

    • Academics

    • Athletics

    • Other Extracurricular Activities

    • Dating

Following are some of the possible areas where you may be having difficulty in your life.

• SITUATIONAL LIFE CRISES

  • Stress

  • Age Milestones Or Transitions (Ex. 12, 13, 16, 18, 21, 25, 30, 35, 40…)

  • Medical Issues, Physical Illness, Injury, Disability

    • Self

    • Family Member

    • Chronic Illness (Self Or Family)

    • Awareness Of Aging (Physical Decline)

    • Pregnancy

    • Menopause

    • Vasectomy

  • Financial Concerns

• Death In Family/Friends

  • Unexpected

  • Accidental

  • Resulting From Illness

  • Homicide Of Family Members

  • Killed In Combat/War Situations

  • Confronting Your Own Death

  • Suicide By Family Members

• Change In Job Or Job Status

  • Promotion

  • Demotion

  • Firing

  • Coping With Retirement

• Natural And/Or Man Made Disasters (Ex. Earthquake, War)

• Family Effects Of Crimes Committed By Family Members Or Friends

• Fears About Entering Military

• Happy Events That Can Be Stressful

  • Living Together

  • Marriage

  • Going To School

  • Graduation

  • Promotion At Work

  • Pregnancy

  • Birth Of A Child

• Changes In Children’s Life

  • Children Moving Out Of Town

    • School

    • Work

    • Geographical Preference

  • Marriage/Divorce Of Child

  • Children Becoming Parents

• WORK ISSUES

  • Unemployment

  • Job Stress

  • Coping With Added Responsibilities

  • Difficulty With Authority

  • Career Indecision

  • Moving Associated With Career Advancement

  • Conflicts Between Career And Family (Work-Life Balance)

    • Awareness Of Differences Between Life Goals And Achievements

    • Dissatisfactions With Goals Achieved

  • Decisions About Retirement

• RELATIONSHIP ISSUES

  • Difficulty Meeting People

  • Difficulty Forming Relationships

  • Difficulty Maintaining Relationships

  • Difficulty Ending Relationships

  • Marital Issues

    • Fears About Commitment/Marriage

    • Living Together

    • Distribution Of Roles And Responsibilities

    • Extramarital Affairs (Yours Or Your Partner’s)

    • Money

      • Wife/Husband Returning To Work (Problem For Him And/Or Her)

    • Sex

    • Medical Issues

      • Menopause

      • Vasectomy

      • Pregnancy

      • Spouse’s Illness/Injury

    • Children

      • Parenting Issues

      • Difficulty Managing Parenting Roles

      • Distribution Of Parenting Responsibilities

      • Rejection By Rebellious Adolescent Children

      • Dealing With Children’s Addictive Behaviors

      • Conflicts With Grown Children

    • In-Laws

    • Conflicts Between Career And Family

      • Awareness Of Differences Between Life Goals And Achievements

        • Managing Conflict Or Disagreements Within The Relationship

        • Dealing With Spouse’s Addiction

        • Separation

        • Divorce

        • Empty Nest (Children Out Of The Home)

    • Communication Problems

    • Pets

• SELF-ESTEEM ISSUES

  • Poor Self Esteem

  • Insecurity

  • Lack Of Confidence

  • Shyness

  • Macho Image

    • Effects On Men And Women

  • Princess Image

    • Effects On Men And Women

  • Pattern Of Repeated Poor Judgment/Decisions

• ISSUES OF VIOLENCE

  • Rape

    • Either Now Or In The Past

      • Happened To You

      • Happened To Someone You Care About

  • Child Abuse

    • Physical

    • Sexual

    • Emotional

  • Adults Abused As Children

  • Adults Molested As Children

  • Spousal Abuse

    • Husband Or Wife Abusing The Other

    • Also Occurs In Same Sex Marriages

    • Also Occurs In Dating

  • Elder Abuse (Abuse Of The Elderly)

    • Physical

    • Sexual

    • Emotional

    • Neglect

  • Crime Victims

    • Rape

    • Molest

    • Incest

    • Assault

    • Murder (Family And/Or Friends)

    • Threats

  • Military Service

    • Coping With Residual Effects Of Military Service

      • Effect On Veteran

      • Effect On Family And Friends

• ADULTS AND THEIR PARENTS

  • Coping With Aging Parents

  • Coping With Ill Parents

  • Sandwich Generation Issues